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cDvI uJUkj
cPb o:K-cPb o:K` Ku YF&l i[ub,
cPb mK-cPb mK` nb[ Pbyjb biub!
ynCyF vmi&o- mnp lYlv Gcuuu DU cvu KuJj mhM&v pll. o:KJovbv mJkv ci lbv oj mjl Dhub mK- Dhu mVl b Duio M[kJ Fljb D<ln km nF&u l hnJb Dm Jj l J kjll. Dhu DJlYJlm Dhuu DM kn cpk cCmb omll, k p hn[SJ{b o:K hl ITvn, Dlbl mnphC, Dhu vl kcb- mbJo kjl Dmll. hC DM cCmb JjU. Dhuhk ynlkb DJmL kM Dml? Sk Eno uKkb Hj mjK kL Dn. Sk Jm- Lku Yiu Dm- DmNu Sk mjF&l l. lb kby Sk IvcU GodOJml Puub Dmlb DC Jmln Dvbl nu-Dh mml l LJj Duu Dml. mjF&l huJj l bl nTv Ku kmUl. lLu omj Jm l hnv uiyiv l箳Jj Ghj kjl. lu #ckMu Jjl. lyjyj n Jm Skoc Y[Y[ Dhu knC lu SkJu uil. l Sklv l omN Jm窮 [Un hCJll. knC mbhl DC l omj Jm cnCl, `Dj u k l o:K cnClm? l cP kL Sk`. ln llkǮ kC knC mbil. oIbcO pC mhl F&<& vc&C nl. MJ oIn Skckbv `Dhub o:K kmb Dn` n Fjmjvb mbi uill. SK ckmjKb MjJj Jv cjJJb lmb l Dhub o:K cjJll, iWpjll, kjJUl ymll.
DhCn kn JU Dmb Jil vn? `k mbi lu?` IjIjlv vICN vl箳 `mjbcin yNo-cPFlkb kcvMy kC Dn k?` Dm Sk hmj DUJuu Dml DC ovl `Dhu Flkb kCu kmb mnv kju uiuub vn` u ukbv oo J DM lci mhl Fs Dml.
Dmb DhC k Jil? Dhu o:Ku pimcj Dmb mpJv-OpJv cb[Clv kClb mK Dhuu cUlb?
`o:K` n Kjb lj Sk Dio cuYl YJv Dn. l箳 kllj s Dnl. Mk, oKJuhC, Dmn糳l, DmcOv, Jov DM kllj hlUbJj DhC o:K DvYJl Dml. l l JU p vm|ik Dm Mjjk EkJ cvmk Dm llkU mHjCj lmo (reflexive responses) Dmlu ln ou pl Dmll. o:K lJl Kh Dmu lj miU GbyUv Duu Jjbv- klj ynj h[C- vj nC ijp Dml. lMJ cCm ckU m IT Mkl vn. hC pj n Jjv mF& D[kuu jk@[&mjKb JjbJj DC llkw lJlvb Jnu uiub lj?
h<hlF& Sk cOcJv i=nC. lb cuvb Ij JjOu v pcvl Dhu hmblǮ cuM hUv pTv uiv kub. l h<hlFv Flk pyj Okwk ymu k mcj ov cnv lbv DbLC hk[ub. ov cnvl pJ{ uk lbv Yu Du lbv mcj Um l hbUm cvb Sk Su. h. (ubyuk jk@[&) `cuǮb yuhC- lbv l箳m Kuuu Kml- l k=lIvhC- l Puu cvmk $m DC DIvb Duub DpjhC- l $m` n miUb `y` n v k{l Sku ui. (`y` k{u lj `n k?` `Kjb!` `Hj JF& n` DM Godijbhjl.) nUnU Ijlu miUbv l Flk J Du, k `Ʈ$ unvhC v...` n Myo Du k Ijlub SkkpC nUӮ Gv ulb Jnu ui. h<hlFv c$ `Dhu o:K- mmC GpUC hvn hvn kjlv` lJ{Ǯ mKo DvYl cU ynO!
JmjJb Dui lNn. l lL&$u iuu Dmlv lbv Dvk oJkj Pk Du. Jm kbhvvb OJhU kv Ghj kjJu. cub OJv Du. Mm$Ƭ Pu. lvblj p Yu lu JmjJb DpjhCb mJmlj J= Sku uib. Ic km Du- FLhmv [@kwjbv k mbilub Dn DC ljn Dpv DmJmLhC km pl vndz FLhl箳 mJ& i l# YCN EkJ HvJj yuCN mvu SkJ ui箳. pbv DM ihhbcO jm J l cOvcOv Mbk Jv- khhC kv x jbil Dpv J{Jl. pbv llk JU EkJ Fs vm l kn kUvb I[Uk[ hnl `yj l- kUp I` Dmb cnCl mkl. Ijlubv n ovn h& ckU vml lcU kn Jkwvblj kv `ybo` kv IC n Sk h& h{ jn. JmjJb `kL` kLv n Glmn DC Ʈk kk cnv kv jnu nl. DL&l DM kj lƬ H Jmkj JǮ oll Dmbn vn. lC箳 Sv Gcol DmCj Dvk pCm Dio Dmb o:K kjJUl, iWpjl ymll. hjmLl lku Dmu ljn l箳M PbpCh# Sk nll {u- Sk nll luJj ITv `u{ km?` Dmb cnCl jnll.
o:Kkjk DvYJ箳 ynj h[C Mkwl DC #cl ovn Dmvn cCmb l l Jjl- DYJǮ mhUl mJl:u k D[kJv Ill? Dmb Jovb oM&v- pnjl EkJ ipJp kucU DhC Sk ol mJl:u DC Fljbvn Kl Dnl n pCJ lbv nl vn k? Dm Dvk > mJYJk Dhu cvl ll.
Sjk yv& vJ箳 Sk cvmMm$%vb J-JR D<k[ yIC箳 hlǮb mjK JMu<C kuub Dn. I am not ok-you are ok (c k vn- lcn c$ k Dnl), I am not ok- you are not ok (c k vn DC lcnn k vn), I am ok-yor are ok cn k Dn- lcnn k Dnl.)
lu MJ-mJl:u DC Fljbv yjyjv mJkjC vji kv m[u lj Flj lvn DJmLbcO JmlmLlu vkjC DC Dhu `Dnb` iWpjl o:Kk[ hnC knm oyU lv omv l. hnu kv cCm kc mJl: Fljbh# kl Dnl (ci l o:K箳 yyll k Dmv!) l mv m kjC箳 lvl Dmll. omN kv cCmb mJl:b o:K DUJv mbil jnll, lj lmN kj cCmb `miUb pi (mJl:mk) kl Ykj DC piC箳 ukǮb vn` n Kbl cvl-Myobl yUiv Dmll. cU vkmv nlb lbb. hC l pCJ nCFlk lb cvb pi=lǮ hlUu vmll. `DhuFlk o:K DvYJ omN kCu vn` kuhvJj l { Dml. b miUl cnJb kjC cnCp lbb Dio mbkuub pi ! mJl: (DC Hj lj kby箳) ijp DC Dkb# huk[ v yI FƮsCjb J ! Sk kj YJvk DiuYl DC mnvYlǮ EkJ lnh# `lodvYl` (Empathy) DYJ.
`c cPb o:K kmb mmub- EkJ mml Dn` hvG&pUC kjClv DM JRv ynO Sk kj `cvmk JmJ` cUl DmJ. MJ Fljb kCJhC& EkJ o& cUl l JiUǮ. DM cb[U ynlko pv pv (hC DL&l `mmC箳`) DJCRcO Kh jcuu Dmll. `Dc箳 JU...` n huho mcj oj h l ml Jkwbci Dmlb. lv Kjb mcOv- Dvbo cUl k hC kjn ci Fs nl vn. DhC vc&C kuu o:Kl DhC D[kv jnl.
Dhub Mjjk- cvmk o:K kmb kln Dm l J kjC箳 i l pi- JU Dmll, n Yv ci mv plb. hMJF&lu Sk mjojb Hj cpoj DKƳk Dn. n mjoj Dlbl hjc- Gbhj- jCbiCJj JpmjK lUhCj. Sko Jv hjluJj lbv vnJu Mc (o{) kv ICm yuJu. vnJ cuK GlJU Dvd lW[U. o{ kjlv iuu Jmlj L[ KuJj uiu DC mjojmnyb lW[v `mm! n` Dm Godij ynj h[u. lyjyj vnJ Godiju, `k Ov, SJ{by o:K mmJbv, ci pPl k kjlJ!` Pub. mjojmny l[kv Gu. vnJu kKl Ov ljlj DbiCl ITv iu. lL khNl Juu Yubhk Sk Yu Guu DC vnJu D% ku, `Dm mcj J lP h!` Ylvb iY&iUl Puu vnJ箳 hJuJj mJl:b jk hTu i箮 oyl lbv Yu HU Dhu hlv Djhj pcvl ImJu. vnJ箳 Cblk EkkUvb cnulu miU OJl Du. mjojmnyb khUJj j Ic LWy m[u lj nNJj mjklm v nuuu. `k vnJyJ- mmJlb v o:K? jCbiCJj plv cv GljJ箳 ljvb pl Dcn lLb. Dmu HkU pKcbv kC Jjlb? hC Ij Dmlv Dcb cv llkb Ifcf vmlb- Dub k Ov?' kkuCN vnJu mjojmnybb mhkjC SkC lj M ku?
DKƳk Kj-K oJ pC; hC llv Sk vkwk mcplb k o:K J kjCn kU-JU DC c&o Dml. l pbv Gcpl vn l o:K c$ hv: hvn JUm ol GiUl jnll DC vkUl lCu vcb$C ol jnll. kjC o:K JjbJj k kjlv mJYJkhC Dhu Jm l cvJmLlv nl Dml. Dhu Mjjk lmo (Go. joy, Ic, yOjl, Mnj) kn DbM lj Mjjl vc&C nl Dmll. lJn FLb cv OjC cnJ Dml. o:K J kjb kJn, iUb kJn, l vkM DvYJu Mkw lJ{b lmLhC oj mjb kJn, Jj Elv Puub DmCb ijp Dn.
kn J o:K GI[hC J v kjl kc cvl l o[hv oyv kl Dmll. koƮl J kjCpi J Dmhm vn cnCv, koƮl mJYJl: DlmMk (passive) Dmll cnCv l mJ& lJlb o:Kb H `mnv` kjl jnll. hC DhC n u#l Ilub hnp k DM o[huu, oyuu o:Kb JJO hbv Dhu HC k{l jnCj. hjmLlJ<, cCmbJ< kc kjkj kjCN, Ʈ[Ʈ[ kjCN J DhC Dpypu yIl. (kO kO DhCn l 'mood' cO pl.) Kjy Eji Dmuu kkjcOv JH pM Hmk-Hmk kjl kvlj ynj h[l jnl, lmb n o:K kO vvMlv, kO mJhvblv, kO Fljbv o< oClv lj kO Dlc/ hjEnmlv ynj h[lv omlb. plk o[hCb pml llk lb lƬ DOk lJ. SKo hjmLlvb ibpuu m$ Dhu DyO cuu #uuk km H[H[ cjl lJn- EkJ- SK pJui JǮ c=lvblj Kh mMkhC l o:K oyv JJnju uiuub kC Dvk JU DJU hb iU uilb lJn- o:K JH ynj h[ lv kjl Dml.
o:K Mjjbn Dmlb DC cvbn. l kn lJj kjl l vn. kC cnCu k `cPb o:K k Dn l cu cnl!`
`pb pUlb- lu kUlb` n pj kln cvub lj lkb o:K kn Dblc hlUǮb o:K vn l mloKu cv kub hnp. Ykbh- mvcmjK JjJbKu pb Ijb- ojb- kby GodOJml Pu, lbb o:K cb- k Dljk kjJbcU p cub Dku DvL Pu lb o:K cb, n miUb Skl- hnl Dmlv Dhuu hj#l Dh#h# 10-15 ck& kc h[u, EkJ cMv mbO y@m箳 K$[hCcU iu EkJ Kh oJmbhmv puu Jm yl kn Dvh#l D[CcU yjiUu n o:Kbn Dhhu hlUJj cǮ! yjyu cnCl lmb DKuu jI v hml s kj Dmu lj l Mpj omj c jI cju hnp. hnu jI Dhmk s nTv pF&u.
n kn Hj mhb vn n lj Kjb Dn. hC n kn kJU mblk kuhv (Theorotical concept) vn. o:K mbcl, vck DYJ kM kjl F&u? mJl:u EkJ Fljbvn lhok nCj vn DM hlvb mJl:b o:K kmb mJkjl F&u?
k. jcomp kUmkj n j^dz mJbmJk mbI Sk p k&klx. lbv oO&j Dm kk&ji nl. lb Jm- &- mJ& vpl k&c l lcU kOn Jl Du vn. moJ mVƮ. lb c=l Pu ln kk&jicU vJn lj Dl[blu DblJ&C (Ulcer) HucU. l箳 Dou oJM %v yOvǮ mbuk k. Dhh hW[m b hnu mc=lmYl lbb Y<C c Skub nlb. l mbhC& Y<Cl lb Mjjk Jov FJumn hjCc pCJl vJnl. Flkb Glk, mV yuCb nlb l!
Yjl箳 cnu hblOv Fbojp b Ok cu- mbp ibOR DhIl- Dku c=l Pu. l jpkjClu cjuu J Dmu lj MJ Sk `DF&` nl. l hC& kUl lb nNJjb o:K mnp Jl l nlb, hC l o:Kvb lb lu {Uuu- yuCl- JiCl kO omu vn.
[@. Dvl DJ JmvcǮ UJUlu Dlbl kl&yij- lUcUǮ k&kl&. lb j箳 kk&jicU Sv kc箳 Gcol c=l Pu. Sk Dlbl mbhV, m{ DC vklc mnpJv uYuu [@. Dvu DJ lb hl! lbv kl o:K Pub Dmu! hC DvllF DC lb mjK mnJmb MyoƮ$C kv lbv Jil o:K Dlbl mbl DYJ ku. lcU lbvn DvllF DJCRv GpU oC Dvbo cUu DC Jkbv Sk DvkjCdz vlb h yIu cUub.
o:Kb Dmb mbl, DL&hC& DC ljn lC vj kjCjb oM&v kmb I[Jl F&u? lIb DC DM Dhu YJlǮn Dvk iuY YJvkl DmCN JRk[ vjKv hnub, lj Sk m$ Dhu u#l F&u. l Dmb- k lk Jm `mJo:K箳 lJ pCJ`k[v `hjo:K箳 mnp pCJ`hl Puu Dn. cnCv mJ& mnv kvn l Dlbl mbcl- ljn jk DYJ k Mku.
mJl: o:Kh# cb- Jhk o:K cnl DmCb n pmb mJo:Kl luu cCmu ynj h[Cm DOjYl jlb lmb Dhub o:K kjJUC Hjml vmCb nn! Empty mind is devils workshop n yyll kl Kjb Dn! cCm kCln J EkJ k=lǮ Dm, v<dzl n l箳 FJuM Jovun DYUFlk yvJl DC k=lcivl kln c o:K mnp JmjCb mcL& oT Mkl. cp Kmoj jc vF&k kn J<hJa kk&jiv Dpj nl lJnn Mkw lJn DC Mkw lJ{ vncǮb kc l kjl nl. llv JOM Pi[Cb yU lbv cUl nlb. cOblj Sk F&-cu Ju. Sk vcJbl Jcyu[v Jpl vm KU[u DmO DM kk&jivb mub. lvb l Hjmb mblhC Ilub. DpjhC箳 kUln kn mcpk kcbm lvb hm GY ku. kn ukbv lu D&vb Jjub, `lcb DpjhC - l oO&jl lcnu kO lC l vn k?` l cnCu, `n lj! mJlu cu Jub - Why me? cu k n Dm oO&j ji p[J? hC vblj c Kh Jj ku. c vm KUl. piYjlv p h uK cub Gc vm KUll llu kn npjbv Lc op&b Dbljj^dz hlUǮ KU KUu cUl. llu kn KU[ cvbkl nTv - cnJ箳 - B[ mu@c mhO& KUll. llun nl箳 yJj cpCFlk - Gh-Ghvl Hjl hll DC knpC Jpl jll. c pJn B[ mu@c Epku lJn cP cvl n > Du vn k, Why me? cP vMyl n hjmkj k? l M c pj mnphC - i=nl OjumjKb Ilub - hJub lj ci Dpj箳 JUǮ Why me? Dmb c k cnC?`
KjKj - n Jj Dhuu Jovk[ - o:Kk[ yIC vjUǮ ol. mJl:k[ kJ vpjlv hnCSJp `kC` DOk mJk< - JOk DM cvmklk[ vCj n lv kjCb vkwkǮ oo oCpi i Dn, vn k?
p uk Dhu Mjjk - cvmk o:Kb hv:hvn GpUC kjll, lbv Dmn lv kjJ, k ojJU l DJC k{lv, l hvD&vYJlv plv DhC lk[ ciuh# DOk lmLhC hn Mkl k? lb kn JMu<C k Mkl k? lcU Mjjk Gpv kc nF&u, hC lyjyj JjbcOn kn m you nT Mku, Dmb Jlb.
`J=lJ` n o:K kjCb Sk cb vc Dm Mklb. Mjjk lko kc nCb, Jcvvmj kn kcb v pcCb - JO nCb cU J mll o:K- vjM- Ʈ[Ʈ[ yvl. Sk kj nlyul DumjK Jl. Dhu YJlǮ lC J箳 JicU- ilcvlcU- lvcU vvlJ YJv DumjK Jl. o:Ku Kjb lj D<Ohj knǮ Glj vn, n cnl Dmlb lcU mll pv DJCl jcCb - Dhu JU mcpk- D|Lk hjmLlǮ, nuDhb mboY& mll k{l DC mbil jnCb cU vJ h{M Dmuu - Jnu nJ Dmuu mbJo kc nl pl, ll. ln lC l. Dvkbv Yju kbyl Skk h[umjKb Jlb. JM<l: J= i=nCRv - pbv v ovcJlj kMl Hj iblJv Iluub vn, yk Tp& JhjC mJ Juu vn lbv lJ o:K - vjM Pk T Mkll. lC-Dhlbv J=b mll nostalgic nCb (YlkUl jcCb) - mJl:Jj- FljbJj Ʈ[Cb DJ[l vn. lbmcj #lpb - piC DJnvb - 30-35 J<hJah# Kh JiU, DOk JU Dmll. piC Ji LhJCb - kc kjCb - ynO Hj nll vmlb. DM JU J= cb[UR DJmL KjKj EhpNlu CmjK nl. hC ci l o:KJj Glj k? Dm > l jnl.
Tuesdays with Morrie vJ箳 mlIvJj DOjl Sk kobyjl Jj Hj mjK Y< kub Dn. c@j n JL祮 Kh u[k J= Ohk c=lM糳Jj Dnl. ln kCkCvb - #C#Cvb Mjj mbJovnv kjCN o|cU DC DmO DM jivb! lb Sk DJ[l JLa oj cbiUJj Tv lbM ihh cjl Dn. Dvk JiJiU J<bJj! kO hm, kO c, JJn, c=l, kby Dm Dvk J<...! Sk cbiUJj lb ihhb J< Dml, `JO&kw Yl`. JLa lbv Jjl, `lcnu Dc箳 lC箳 lv nJ Jl vn k n?` c@j MblhC Godijll, `cM, Dj J= cCmbv lCb nJ JCb DMkw vnǮ. hC c Dm k lcn mJl:u km mJkjl! l D lMl Dnm. cn lMl nl DC Dp mjl DmCj v. Dp cP D<l k mboj Dn - ml Dn - biub Dn l cu MOu nJb, mll ci JUv yIluvb cvlu mhO& J{l DC J n kn mhOx c Dm Mkl vn.` Sk KuJj m ITv l cnCll, `DC Kjb lj cM, cPlu Skk Yi cnCp Skk J DvYJ Dn. c lv J<祮 - on J<祮 - hmlm, hVm Dn. c l miUblv iu Dn - l J c Dlv-ynv piu. pJn cu `cu nCl Dvbo Jl` l i Jlb lJn c `cu` nl. pJn SKo pCl J= nCb ijpb Jlb lJn lm nl. c k k J nT Mkl yI v! Dl c$ c pj `lP Jl` Dn lj c lP nJ km k Mkl?` cu Jlb, miU p vijkbv c@jǮ YckJj Jj kjCb ijpb Dn. p Dm Jj kjlnl, lbv l Dhu c$-mvn cb[URhl hJu nJ Dn. `pvjMv i@h` ypJC Sk ypvb nCj n m lv Dm Mku, kllj o:Kb - Jovb lJl llv kc nF&u. n v?`
kn JU Dmbn Jlb k mll mKb DjOv kjCb - mK GhYiCb vb hC cCm DiuY DC kl=&lJnv yvl Dmu k? o:Kb GpUC - oM&v kjCh# l箳M Pi[Clv cCm `mJ` DOk yUk nl Dmu k? o:K箳 Jj oM&vlv `kC kuc` hPjl Dmu k?
hb[J JvJmu vIu lJn lbv Jojb DMJ&o Ilu. kbl pj Jvl vIu vJnl ljn lvb Jojbv vcmkj ku - lJn Jojbv lu Jjub, `l Flk pCl - iuY - n mv<, lu c k DMJ&o oT?` lJn kbl Godiju, `n , cP Dlub o:K Ʈjblv jnu, kc jnu Dm cu DMJ&o .` Dm piJiU DMJ&o lvb k cilu Dmu? mKb hjcJOcO DhC Dhu kl&Ju Jm, Fljb ijpbk[ h HjJ, Dmb lu Jub Dmu k?
kn Dm, `o:K` nm cCmm Sk jk M Dm Mkl n vkwk. H n o:K EkJ Jov ckmjK v cjJl, lb oM&v v kjl DVmjK hJJ - cjJJ uil, lJn llv piCm - GVlm h<C cUv plb.
h iU b `o:K nJ` kJll cnCv cnub,
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mbpJk Dvd mcL&!
`Dmb o:K` Dhu miUb cvl pi DM Dh#mn...!